So I was watching a show on Netflix a few days ago called “I Am Not Okay with This”. I was just putting something on to help make one of my many nemeses—Laundry Day—seem less intimidating. I didn’t expect to really get into it…and then I watched the whole season in one day…and then I finished the laundry.
That’s not to say that I think it’s the most phenomenal thing ever and everyone MUST go watch it NOW. Though it very well may be. I don’t know. People haven’t started paying for my opinions…yet.
If you’re thinking “This chick must be a big fan of ellipses”…you would be correct.
I spent the whole day watching it though because I very quickly found myself identifying with the main character. So much so, that I just had to see how she would handle all the crap that was piling up on her plate.
It’s about a high school girl named Sydney, who recently lost her father to suicide and isn’t coping well. She very quickly discovers that she has these destructive superpowers that seem to be activated when she gets angry or overstressed and is on the verge of a major panic attack. I say destructive because she can’t control it, and almost every time her powers come out someone gets hurt and (here it comes) she Is NOT Okay with This.
See what they did there?
I’ve been learning a lot about story structure and themes and whatnot, and as I was analyzing myself and why I liked the show so much, I realized it was the freaky dangerous superpower inducing panic attacks that made me empathize with Sydney. It reminded me of that pubescent and ragingly hormonal stage in my life (high school) when I was an emotionally unhealthy person wrestling with my own fear of losing control of my anger and causing irreversible damage to another person, and dealing with “less than ideal” family relationships.
I’m going to go out on a limb and assume that this is exactly what the creators were trying to portray with Sydney. And I connected so deeply with how much she struggled with this that it was cathartic and therapeutic to watch, even so many years later after I’ve already achieved a much healthier mindset. I wish so much that this show had been around when I actually was in high school. It would have helped me realize I was not alone. Someone somewhere had to have known exactly what it felt like to be me to be able to create a story like this.
As someone who used to devour books and stories in a desperate attempt to not only escape my life but to also find a connection to others who were hurting, I want to bring that kind of catharsis and healing to other readers. When people read my books I want them to feel that feeling. That someone out there knows what they are going through and that they are not alone. I want to be able to give them hope that they will find healing and it will get better. I want my stories to give them the strength to hold on until that day comes.
This is my ultimate goal as a writer. My second is making enough money from my writing to pay all the bills while working from home with my family, and I take no shame in that.
I’m sure a decent number of you have similar motivations to write, but how many? And how many of you are driven by something else?
What is it that motivates you? You can share in the comments or if you’ve already written about it somewhere else, leave a link to it. I’m always looking to connect with fellow writers and to learn more about the human condition so that I can better my character development skills.
Well…it’s Laundry Day again tomorrow, and I’ve heard a lot of mixed messages about this “Tiger King”.